Impasse - A Lack Of Progress
An impasse describes a deadlock: a situation in which no progress feels like it’s currently possible or happening in your therapeutic process.
It’s the point in our process of emotional and psychological growth when we are actively learning and changing and we find ourselves feeling stuck and without the resources and strategies to face our present situation. We’ve realised that our past way of being no longer serves us as a healthy way of being in the world, but we can’t yet see the way forward and how to get there. The present, the path forward and the future feel very scary and very uncertain in these moments.
Hold tight.
Breathe.
Find ways to let yourself rest, find ways to accept this space and see if you can find compassion for your feelings, thoughts and the present uncertainty.
And make sure you have the support you need right now. Keep people close who make you feel supported, soothed and accepted without judgement or demands for you to be a certain way. This may even feel limited to the person who is professionally accompanying you in your healing process, and if it’s the only person you feel can fill these needs mentioned, don’t worry, this is temporary. Know that more people with this capacity will come into your life as you move along your healing journey. In this period of impasse, it is crucial that you have someone that can offer you this outside support so that you’re able to breathe through the discomfort and stay present, rather than running back to the familiar but unsatisfying, previous ways you’ve coped and survived until now. It won’t be like this forever, but right now you need a gentle, firm and supportive hand to keep you on track until you feel more stable and have learnt to self-soothe and offer yourself the compassion, support and love you need.
You’re growing, changing and learning. That is often uncomfortable. But you’re also healing. You’re on your way, even if you can’t see the path just yet! It’s a critical moment where growth and transformation become possible if you’re able to stay, be present and confront your fears and discomfort.
It’s a good moment to keep some Love Notes, mine or your own, close. Repeat them to yourself in moments of chaos and self-doubt. This too shall pass.